A GOLF POEM FOR ALL GOLFERS
In My Hand I Hold a Ball,
White And Dimpled, And Rather Small,
Oh
How Bland It Does Appear,
This Harmless Looking Little Sphere.
By Its Size I Could Not Guess,
Of
The Awesome Strength It Does Possess.
But Since I
Fell Beneath Its Spell,
I've Wandered Through The Fires Of.......
My Life Has Not Been Quite The
Same,
Since I Chose to Play This Stupid Game.
It Rules My Mind for Hours On End.
A Fortune It Has Made Me Spend.
It Made Me Curse And Made Me Cry.
And Hate Myself And Want to Die.
It Promises Me a Thing Called Par,
If I Hit It Straight And Far.
To Master Such A Tiny Ball,
It Should Not Be Very Hard At All.
But My Desires The Ball Refuses,
And Does Exactly As It Chooses.
It Hooks And Slices, Dribbles And Dies,
And Disappears Before My Eyes.
Often It Will Have A Whim,
To Hit A tree
Or Take A Swin.
With Miles Of Grass On Which To Land,
It Finds A Tiny Patch Of Sand.
Then
Has Me Offering Up My Soul.
If Only It
Would Find The Hole.
It Made Me Whimper Like A Pup,
And Swear That I Will Give It Up.
And Take To Drink To Ease My Sorrow,
But The Ball Knows....I'll Be
Back Tomorrow.
